My eyes and my heart have been opened WIDE in so many ways this past week with the death of George Floyd and the protests.

I’ve come to understand my own willful ignorance and silence around the pervasive racism in this nation.

I am a highly educated woman who embraced the “safety” of ignorance and silence rather than learning and participating in difficult conversations and educating myself on the racial issues that have plagued our nation since it’s founding.

My unwillingness to educate myself and speak up makes me part of the problem, part of this system that allows for the sanctioned murder of black men and boys. 

I am horrified – by the system, by what’s happened, by what continues to happen over and over, by my own complacence and willful ignorance.

I’ve refused to do the work to understand, reform, or heal these issues.

My silence is ending with a heartfelt apology to all BIPOC in my community and in this nation, and a pledge to learn and educate myself on these issues, to use my voice for change, to participate in this conversation, to take action. 

There’s a reason the word CREATE implies action. While learning and education is SUPER important, I cannot create without ACTION, otherwise, it’s merely an idea stuck in my head.

I have been a morning journaler/soul writer for years. The page is the space I turn to again and again, almost every day, to work through what I’m learning, internalize it, and figure out what to DO, what ACTION to take. My soul will guide me.

I do this in two ways and I invite you to explore these as well:

1) My tried and true morning soul writing – you can learn more about soul writing with this podcast episode.

2) Smashbooking – which for me is taking the insights from my soul writing, putting them in another journal with a prayer and intuitively working through them in a visual way. My podcast episode this week was an interview with Catt Z, an artist who discovered her inner artist at age 60 and created cosmic smashbooking as a process to both meet her muse and work through trauma and difficulties.

If you are struggling to understand what’s been happening and how you feel about it, and what you can do about it, I encourage you to educate yourself and dive into either soul writing (if writing is more your comfort zone), Cosmic Smashbooking (if visual art is your thing), or both to gain deeper understanding of what you are learning and to figure out what actions you can take to help end the systemic racism and achieve equality.

This IS work. 

It’s HARD work. 

It’s DEEP work. 

It’s crucial to healing ourselves and our nation.

Start with a baby step. 

Start with reading an article. 

Start with writing one page on your thoughts and feelings. 

Start with sitting with the discomfort of your own ignorance around these issues. 

Start with becoming aware of and calling out the racist behavior you see in yourself and in others, no matter how scary, or even if you get it wrong.

But start, wherever you are with whatever calls to you.

xo,

Amy

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